By definition, all pre-existing conditions pre-exist this coverage, while post-existing conditions fall after; those with current conditions should just drop in to see what condition their condition is in.

Individuals already sick do not qualify for benefits since this is, after all, health insurance. Those seeking sick insurance might try Aflac.

Special provisions: Young Republicans may stay on their parents’ coverage until age fifty; under RepubliCare certain inheritable diseases such as gout and psoriasis are covered, as well as corneas that ripened during the Reagan Administration. Healing faiths or practices such as Christian Science, Scientology, atavistic endeavorism (Hunter S. Thompsonism), Vodoun, Voudou, or Voodoo, Sevi Lwa, Shamanism, Evangelical Lutheran, and Santeria may be covered in states that choose to opt in.

Michael Feldman's whole article appears on page 20 of the February 2010 issue. Subscribe to The Progressive for just $14.97 by clicking here for immediate access.