We’re in the middle of National Adoption Month, and November 20 is National Adoption Day.

To honor these commemorations, and most importantly, to help kids, we should make sure that same-sex parents have the right to adopt.

Officially recognizing the importance of adoption began with President Gerald Ford, who proposed a National Adoption Week. President Bill Clinton made National Adoption Month official in 1995.

But even with the increased awareness, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services 115,000 kids in the United States are currently in the foster care system and waiting to be adopted, and hundreds of thousands more are waiting for private adoptions.

Nevertheless, many states do not allow same-sex parents to jointly adopt.

It’s prohibited outright in 3 states: Michigan, Mississippi and Nebraska, and it is restricted in Arkansas, North Dakota and Utah. It is only clearly permitted in 17 states. Same-sex joint adoption laws are unclear in the other 37 states.

I am fortunate; both of my children were born in New York State. My spouse and I were able to simultaneously adopt as same-sex parents and the birth certificates stated parent one and parent two instead of mother and father.

Some states do allow gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender parents to adopt as a single parent. Some states also allow second-parent adoptions for same-sex couples. But many states allow neither.

This turns same-sex couples into second-class parents, regardless of the fact that they do as good a job parenting as anyone else.

And the prohibitions also turn children of same-sex couples into second-class kids. If gay or lesbian parents have an adopted child in a state where that is legal and then they move to a state where it is not, the child’s legal status is up in the air. The child may not be able to obtain health insurance, inheritance and other benefits from the parent who cannot legally adopt.

This year, President Obama proclaimed National Adoption Day “a day of hope and happiness.” And at the beginning of National Adoption Month, he said, “We honor the loving embrace of adoptive families and the affirming role of adoption in the lives of American families and our country.”

Same-sex parents can provide that loving embrace and that affirming role just as well as heterosexuals.

Here’s to all states allowing same-sex parents to adopt singly and jointly.

And here’s to every parent, of whatever sexual orientation, who adopts and lovingly cares for a child.

Akilah Bolden-Monifa is a freelance writer based in Oakland, Calif. She can be reached at pmproj [at] progressive [dot] org.

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