Posted by Anonymous on February 09, 2012

It’s Half-Time in America! Let’s bring to the field our half-time show!

It’s not the Madonna. It’s the Whore and her Marching Taliband, led by that aspermative action majorette Rick “the P is silent” Sanctimoron. He’s from Old Dominion.

Because of a dwindling supply of white people, the white wing of the Republican Party wants no sex education in schools, no choice for women and no contraceptives.

The Catholic Bishoprics have not a moral leg to stand on since the pedo scandal. Retired Cardinal Egan just said they did nothing wrong and he never should have apologized.

The Clothmen are trying to get the government to enforce the laws they cannot make their own parishioners follow.

And somehow THEY are the victims! Neat trick. Why not go hide in the catacombs again?

Since unfair is unfair, I suggest: no insurance coverage for St. Viagra; prescription drug counter clerks can refuse to fill Cialis prescriptions; every woman gets a can of mace and a gun.

Just a reminder: The most reliable contraceptive is lesbianism.

Kate Clinton is a faith-based, tax-paying, America-loving political humorist and family entertainer. With a career spanning over 25 years, Kate Clinton has worked through economic booms and busts, Disneyfication and Walmartization, gay movements and gay markets, lesbian chic and queer eyes, and ten presidential inaugurals. She still believes that humor gets us through peacetime, wartime and scoundrel time.

If you liked this article by Kate Clinton, a columnist for The Progressive magazine, check out some of her other pieces by clicking here.